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“Afraid of failure as a mother or father with BPS? Specific strategies for emotion regulation and healthy boundaries.”
Can I be a good mother or father with borderline personality disorder?
Many people with borderline (BPS) will ask themselves this question at some point, especially if they already have children or are thinking about starting a family. The fear of one's own failure is often overpowering.
Continue reading ‘Borderline as a parent: The balance between intense emotions and education’“The crisis is often followed by icy self-hatred. This is how you break the spiral of shame and guilt and find your way back into regulation.’
It's a scenario that many of us know all too well. The storm is over. Perhaps it was an intense outburst of anger, a panic reaction from acute fear of loss, or a moment when the internal pressure became so great that self-harming behavior seemed to be the only functioning valve. While in the acute situation the adrenaline rushes and the body works in absolute survival mode, then, when the calm comes in, the inevitable emotional hangover follows.
Continue reading “Managing Shame and Guilt on Borderline: The way out of the darkness after the emotional storm’"What's behind Borderline's black-and-white thinking? Find out why splitting occurs and how you can use specific DBT strategies to allow emotional shades of grey.”
Those who live with borderline symptoms or love a person who struggles with them may know these moments: Just there was still close, suddenly everything is in danger. This text is not intended to condemn, but to make it clear why this is happening – and how to find more nuances step by step.
Continue reading ‘Between light and darkness: How to better understand and dismantle black-and-white thinking in borderline symptoms”“Why inner emptiness can be so tormenting at Borderline – and how self-care, structure, creativity and secure connection can help.”
There are pains that can be easily explained to other people. A broken arm can be X-rayed, the plaster is the visible proof of the injury. A bleeding wound can be disinfected and connected. A loud dispute has concrete words, a loss has a clear name and a socially accepted time of mourning.
Continue reading “Overcoming inner emptiness and loneliness: When borderline feels like a hole in one’s own mind’“A wrong word, a look – and inside everything explodes. Behind this anger is often not malice, but fear, pain and overload. This article shows what lies behind it and what can help.”
It often happens within milliseconds: A false word, a fleeting, misunderstood look or a supposed rejection – and suddenly the heat shoots into the head. The world narrows into a tunnel, the heart races, blood pressure rises, and before the mind can intervene, anger bursts forth with destructive force. Words are fired like sharp arrows, doors are slammed, or anger is autodestructively directed against one's own person.
Continue reading ‘Anger outbreaks under control: When the Volcano Awakens – A Deep Guide to Dealing with Sudden Aggression in BPS’“Near ‑Distance Understand ‑ conflicts in relations with Borderline ‑Symptomatics – and deal with them constructively.”
There is jealousy that comes and goes: a short pull in the stomach, a thought like ‘Okay … why is this triggering me right now?’ – and then it settles down again. And there's jealousy that feels like a state of alarm. Not as a ‘drama for attention’, but as a real danger: as if it became clear in seconds that you would be replaced, abandoned or devalued immediately.
Continue reading "Jealousy, fear of loss and trust""Instable love is not a drama, but a system crash between the panic of abandonment and the fear of closeness – but this code can be patched."
It's Friday night. Actually, a relaxed dinner was planned. The week was long, the anticipation was great. But a "wrong" sentence, a misunderstood look or an answer to WhatsApp, which came two minutes too late, has suddenly changed the atmosphere in the room. The air suddenly burns. What was just the ‘great love’ and the ‘perfect match’ is now a threat.
Continue reading “Understanding on-off relationships at Borderline and breaking the loop”“Understanding Causes – Developing Strategies – Shaping Relationships Consciously”
For many people, proximity is pleasant and distance is a harmless break. For people with an Borderline personality disorder (BPS) is the equilibrium fragile, highly sensitive system. The inner pendulum between ‘very close’ and ‘very far away’ can strike without warning – sometimes within minutes, seemingly ‘for no reason’, but actually triggered by microstimuli, stress residues or ambiguous signals.
Continue reading ‘Borderline: Why proximity and distance remain an eternal field of tension’
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